Shall We Dance? - Part 3
By Allan E. McNabb

During our study on dancing, we outlined four basic principles we use to determine whether an activity, such as dancing, is sinful.

  • We are to glorify God in our bodies, and exalt Christ (1 Cor. 6:19-20; Phil. 1:20).
  • We are to do things that are honorable and respectable in the sight of all men (Rom. 12:17; Phil. 4:8), obeying God in everything we do (Acts 4:19; 5:29).
  • We shouldn't engage in lustful and licentious (sensual) behaviors (Rom. 6:12; 1 Jn. 2:16; 2 Cor. 12:20-21; Jude 1:4).
  • We shouldn't engage in questionable behaviors (Rom. 14:23; 1 Th. 5:21-22).

In this article, we explore father-daughter dances, and dancing at wedding receptions, which are closely related.

Father-Daughter Dances
Certain forms of dancing between a child and parent aren’t sinful.  For example, playful dancing, such as a father swinging a three-year-old child to music, is not sinful.  But other types of dancing with a parent, or anyone else, are sinful.

The typical father-daughter dance is with girls up to age twelve.

Lately, though, Father-Daughter Purity Balls have become popular.  At these balls, young ladies between nine and eighteen years old, are escorted by their fathers, grandfathers, brothers, or uncles.  Mothers are also invited to attend the ball, and sometimes whole families attend.

During the purity ball, young ladies pledge to remain pure, and the fathers pledge to protect their daughters in the area of purity, while also remaining pure in their own lives as men.

Questions that some Christians ask, are, “Can a father and daughter go to a dance?” and “Can a father dance with his daughter at her wedding reception?”

I believe the answer to both questions is “no.”

For the reasons previously outlined, regarding husbands and wives dancing in public, I don’t believe fathers should dance with their daughters in public.

  • It can encourage lustful desires of people who are watching, even though the father and daughter remain absolutely pure in their thoughts and motives.
  • The example set forth would encourage other Christians to dance.
  • It’s not honorable in the sight of all men – brethren.
  • Christians are to hold fast to what is good, abhorring evil and thus abstaining from every form of evil.

Additionally, I believe the lesson a father teaches his daughter, when taking her to a father-daughter dance, is not the correct lesson.
I remember when Pam and Andrea were in Brownies, and the organization had a father-daughter dance.  Of course, the girls being children, and not knowing the Scriptures because of their youth, wanted to go.

After reviewing the Bible principles associated with the issue, knowing I needed to tell the girls the reason for my decision, the thing that stuck out most was the precedence I was setting, and the lesson I was teaching.

It wouldn’t be long till I had to deal with homecoming and prom.  Now was the time to begin teaching them about dancing.

In a nutshell, this is what I told the girls:  It was okay to goof off and have fun with dad, doing silly dances around the house, and one day they could dance in private with their husbands.  But we shouldn’t go to father-daughter dances.  Before long, they’d have boys asking them to dances at school, and they’d have to say “no,” so they shouldn’t start going to dances, not even with dad.

Wedding Receptions
Along the same lines as father-daughter dances, some people justify dancing at wedding receptions because a bride and groom’s first dance is “pure.”

As already explained, there are a number of reasons why it would be inappropriate for a husband and wife, or father and daughter, to dance in public.

Perhaps more than anything, such dancing would encourage sin.

If a bride and groom dance at their wedding reception, everyone else would be encouraged to dance, perhaps in the same way, slow dancing while holding each other close.

Can you imagine a couple from church getting married and dancing at the reception?  Can you imagine the father of the bride dancing with his daughter?  Then can you imagine the elders slow dancing with the bride, followed with slow dancing with all the women at church?  Then can you imagine all the teenagers slow dancing with each other, just like the bride, groom, and elders?  Then can you imagine the elders slow dancing with the teenage girls, and the elders’ wives slow dancing with the teenage boys?

Thinking about this, I can hear the kids exclaim, “GROSS!”

Something may be pure, but when displayed in public, encouraging other people to sin, it’s suddenly defiled.  This is the case with several aspects of a married couple’s relationship.

To Be Continued
In upcoming articles, we’ll explore other types of dancing, such as ballroom dancing, swing dancing, square dancing, line dancing, and high school dances.